Comments on: Female Friends Who Won’t Date You

By: matt

matt — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 05:41:48 +0000

scratch that, she has accepted my heart, i told her how i felt in a poem and how happy she and her son make me. I am a lucky man

By: matt

matt — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 03:29:42 +0000

hello, i am in a very confusing situation. Let me start by saying i knew her from when she was 17 and i was 21. She was dating an ex friend of mine who abused her and cheated on her while she was pregnant with his child. She moved away for a couple years and recently moved back and we became friends again, started small on facebook. She knows i like her a lot, but she also knows i do not try to kiss her and rush things because i am sincere for her, that i can wait for the perfect time. Her now 4 yr old son loves me and the other night he hugged me, called me daddy, and kissed my forehead in front of her and she did not correct him. I really want to date her but she always introduces me as a friend to all her friends. She comes over every day, brings her kid most times, we have slept in the same bed but i never tried anything. I am shy around her and want to tell her that being around her and her son makes me the happiest i have ever been in life. I just have been nervous because i do not know how to tell her after her son said that, i was honored he considered me a dad, i love him like he was my own and love teaching him and playing while she is busy or out for a couple minutes.

By: Sue

Sue — Fri, 20 May 2011 15:41:44 +0000

The truth of the matter is what most guys do is keep (or try to keep) the friendship with the woman they adore and then choose what they would consider a ‘lesser’ partner for sex.

And continue to look for someone they desire more.

By: Max Loh

Max Loh — Wed, 19 Jan 2011 01:21:44 +0000

Speaking from a bit of experience:

Never assume a girl is not attracted to you, until she has told you outright! Even if she tells you “this is not a date.” I hope this helps everyone.

Yo Max, nice name. Let me tell you a story. Once when I was a little boy, about 17, I was total friends with this cute blonde girl who had a boyfriend. I often had the urge to distance myself from her because I saw my attraction for her as “futile” since she had a boyfriend. But, I simply could not resist going on dates with her because she was that awesome. In the end we did some romantic sexy things to each other in a bed. Due to logistics we could not stay together. It led to a lot of emotional pain for me and I wrote many awesome songs. These songs did not win her over, but they help me get other, more awesome girls.

The moral of the story is, uh… music is awesome

By: Max

Max — Mon, 24 Aug 2009 05:04:50 +0000

i met this girl and knew at once i really liked her. she just seems perfect for me. but she just sees me as a friend. i fall in the disparity category because i dont want to lose her as a friend because every once in a while ill get a clue that one day she may like me. it just kills me that she doesn’t see me like i see her now. i dont know what to do!!!
please help me

By: Confused Yungin

Confused Yungin — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 06:03:54 +0000

So this is my situation. Am friends with this girl with whom i never thought i would feel anything for. It seems she enjoys my company a lot and i like being around her too. shes been having some problems with her boyfriend and she’s told me everything about it. Now i feel myself getting attracted to her. She is 2 years older and she constantly refers to me as her “brother”. But we are so close. I just wonder if i should go ahead and tell her how i feel about her or i should spend some time away from her and then change my status (hopefully she’ll see me differently) and this will make her fall in love with me.

By: Graham Booker

Graham Booker — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 19:24:30 +0000

Brad,
That may be what I am describing. The real question is does she consider it a date. If she does, then you are dating her and it is not what I am talking about. The asking to “take her out to eat” sounds more like a date to me though.

By: Brad

Brad — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 23:00:53 +0000

I am in something similar. She says we are close friends, if i leave her alone 4 a couple days she contacts me, she will even go out for walks and coffee. AND IF I ASK TO TAKE HER OUT TO EAT SHE GOES. Does this sound like what u described above

By: Shane Christensen

Shane Christensen — Fri, 22 Feb 2008 17:06:25 +0000

Mr. Fixit is right. Affection is not Attraction. His comment also sounds (reads?) like he’s read (heard of?) David DeAngelo. Unless Mr. Fixit actually IS David D., posing as ‘a mild-mannered reporter’ for the Singleville Times. I wonder…

(There’s a movie, ‘The Myth of the Male Orgasm’ that addresses this exact point. Watch it while drinking, and you might end up cheering & booing at the screen as if it were a hockey match.)

Wouldn’t it be great if we could choose who we were attracted to? Then at least we’d know how it works & why.

Go Aeros!

By: mr fixit

mr fixit — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 08:54:53 +0000

I do believe there are some cases where a girl does change her mind and date the guy, but such cases are rare.

it is rare because the guy never changes, hence he never becomes more attractive. attraction is not a choice. change yourself to change others reaction to you. if he grew rich and suddently mr social status and told her he didnt like her and talked to 10 other girls, she might change her attitude fast